Deep-ish Thoughts…Is there No End to this Folly?

Welcome, Dr. Sanity readers!

I hate to hear it when someone calls an inanimate object “sexy”. Automobiles are not “sexy”. Cell phones are not “sexy”. Handbags are not “sexy”. Patricia Heaton, on the other hand, is “sexy”.

I find people who know how many dimples are on a golf ball or who the gaffer was in all of Woody Allen’s movies, yet cannot name three Associate Justices of the U.S. Supreme Court extraordinarily annoying.

“Snoop Dog”, “Jay-Z”, “Pink”. Remember when singers had actual names, albeit sometimes fabricated?

Archeologists now have definitive proof that Rome was in fact…built in a day! Bet you won’t be hearing about this in the MSM.

Why do I see “the” spelled T-E-H so many times on the internet? Is this a deliberate tpyo?

We see fewer British accented frogs on the boob tube ( I apologize to all boobs, both kinds) these days. However, there are still far too many and perhaps it is time we drain some swamps…er, wetlands to further cull this menace from society.

Speaking of Geico advertising icons, we on the left (yes, I once listened to John Lennon’s Imagine for a full minute before chuckling and snorting) applaud the use of whining, effeminate Neanderthals to protest the wide-spread degradation to which Neanderthals are exposed to this very day. Even sub-species deserve a little R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Insensitivity may very well one day doom these gentle, panty-waisted, limp wrested Nancys.

And speaking of Nancys ( did you notice the smooth segue of these last two comments?), the staunch opponent of the evil Republican “Culture of Corruption” , Nancy Pelosi, has recanted

on her exemption of American Samoa re the minimum wage increase stating, “What’s a $17,000.000 investment? There will be plenty more where that came from!”

Some political pundits are espousing the possibility of a Clinton-Obama Presidential ticket in ‘08. This is nonsense and folderol, knuckleheads, and about as likely as Dubya and Teddy collaborating on a “No Child Left Behind Act”.

There was a time when I feared no man. But women…that was a different story. When I was seventeen (by the way, “It was a very good year”) asking a pretty, barely five foot tall, fifteen year-old girl to go out with me for pizza was terrifying! What if she noticed my palms sweating, my lips twitching, my speech halting and half an octave higher than normal? What if she said, “No!”

Now that I’m in the Autumn of my years, women still have an unknowable mystique that at once intrigues and sometimes frightens the little boy vestiges that remain in me. The internet shorthand “SWMBO” (She Who Must Be Obeyed) resounds with the message that men are not as strong and independent as we like to think.

I know that it is apocryphal that on his deathbed Sigmund Freud said, “What is it that women want, anyway?” But I can’t help echoing that sentiment when I see some women salivate over the likes of

Justin Timberlake or how they used to fawn over that long-haired hippy freak who couldn’t believe it’s not butter.

Finally, it appears that according to Muslim doctrine it is alright to cut off an innocent human being’s head with a sword, but totally barbaric and a blasphemy to accidentally sever the head of a mass murderer during his hanging for his crimes. Praise Allah!